Recreation and Sports Essay Example for Free

Recreation and Sports EssayWhile it whitethorn be true that the stonemason City government ought to devote to a greater extent money to riverside unpaid facilities, this powers telephone circuit does non play a cogent case for increased resources based on river social function. It is easy to understand why city residents would want a cleaner river, scarce this phone line is rife with holes and assumptions, and thus, non strong enough to lead to increased funding. Citing surveys of city residents, the author reports city residents love of water system sports. It is not clear, however, the scope and validity of that survey.For example, the survey could take a leak asked residents if they prefer using the river for water sports or would like to see a hydroelectric dam built, which may convey swayed residents toward river sports. The sample may not switch been representative of city residents, enquire only those residents who live upon the river. The survey may have be en 10 pages long, with 2 school principals devote to river sports. We just do not know. Unless the survey is fully representative, valid, and reliable, it can not be dropd to effectively back the authors argument.Addition solelyy, the author implies that residents do not use the river for swimming, boating, and fishing, despite their professed interest, because the water is polluted and smelly. While a polluted, smelly river would possible cut down on river sports, a concrete connection betwixt the residents insufficiency of river use and the rivers current state is not effectively made.Though there have been murmurts, we do not know if there have been numerous complaints from a wide range of lot, or perhaps from one or two individuals who made numerous complaints. To strengthen his/her argument, the author would benefit from implementing a normed survey asking a wide range of residents why they do not currently use the river.Building upon the implication that residents do n ot use the river due to the part of the rivers water and the smell, the author suggests that a river clean up pass on conduct in increased river usage. If the rivers water quality and smell result from difficultys which can be cleaned, this may be true. For example, if the decreased water quality and scent is caused by pollution by factories along the river, this conceivably could be remedied. But if the quality and aroma results from the natural mineral deposits in the water or surrounding rock, this may not be true.There are roughly bodies of water which emit a strong smell of sulphur due to the geography of the area. This is not something likely to be afffected by a clean-up. Consequently, a river clean up may have no impact upon river usage. Regardless of whether the rivers quality is able to be improved or not, the author does not effectively show a connection between water quality and river usage. A clean, beautiful, safe river often adds to a citys property values, lead s to increased tourism and revenue from those who come to take advantage of the river, and a smash overall quality of life for residents.For these reasons, city government may decide to invest in improving riverside unpaid facilities. However, this authors argument is not likely significantly persuade the city goverment to allocate increased funding. reader Commentary for Essay reply Score 6 This insightful reaction identifies important assumptions and exhaustively examines their implications. The proposal to spend more on riverside amateurish facilities rests on three questionable assumptions, namely THAT THE SURVEY PROVIDES A RELIABLE BASIS FOR cipher PLANNING THAT THE RIVERS POLLUTION AND ODOR ARE THE ONLY REASONS FOR ITS LIMITED RECREATIONAL USE.THAT EFFORTS TO CLEAN THE WATER AND REMOVE THE ODOR WILL BE successful By showing that each assumption is highly suspect, this look for demonstrates the weakness of the entire argument. For example, paragraph 2 points out tha t the survey might not have used a representative sample, might have offered limited choices, and might have contained very few questions on water sports. Paragraph 3 examines the nice connection between complaints and limited use of the river for recreation.Complaints about water quality and odor may be coming from only a few people and, even if such complaints are numerous, other completely different factors may be much more significant in reducing river usage. Finally, paragraph 4 explains that certain geologic features may prevent effective river clean-up. Details such as these provide compelling support. In addition, careful organization ensures that each sore point builds upon the previous ones. For example, note the clear transitions at the jumpning of paragraphs 3 and 4, as well as the logical sequence of sentences within paragraphs (specifically paragraph 4). Although this probe does contain minor errors, it still conveys ideas fluently.Note the effective word choices ( e. g. , rife with . . . assumptions and may have swayed residents). In addition, sentences are not merely vary they also display skillful embedding of subordinate elements. For example, note the sustained parallelism in the scratch line sentence of the concluding paragraph. Since this response offers cogent examination of the argument and conveys essence skillfully, it earns a score of 6. Essay Response Score 5 The author of this proposal to increase the work out for Mason City riverside recreational facilities offers aninteresting argument but to move forward on the proposal would definitely require more information and thought.While the correlations stated are logical and probable, there may be hidden factors that prevent the City from diverting resources to this project. For example, consider the survey rankings among Mason City residents. The thought is that such high regard for water sports will translate into usage. But, survey responses can hardly be used as indicators of actual behavior.Many surveys conducted after the winter holidays reveal people who list course session and weight loss as a top priority. Yet every profession does not equal a new gym membership. Even the articulate of the survey results remain ambiguous and vague. While water sports may be among the residents advanceite activities, this allows for many other favorites. What remains unknown is the priorities of the general public. Do they favor these water sports above a softball field or soccer field? Are they willing to sacrifice the municipal golf course for stop riverside facilities? Indeed the survey hardly provides enough information to discern future use of improved facilities.Closely linked to the surveys is the bold assumption that a cleaner river will result in increased usage. While it is not illogical to expect some increase, at what level will people begin to use the river? The answer to this question requires a survey to find out the reasons our residents use or do not use the river. Is river water quality the aboriginal limiting factor to usage or the lack of docks and piers? Are people more interested in water sports than the recreational activities that they are already active in?These questions will help the city government forecast how much river usage will increase and to assign a proportional increase to the calculate. Likewise, the author is optimistic regarding the state promise to clean the river. We need to hear the source of the voices and consider any ulterior motives. Is this a drift year and the plans a campaign promise from the state representative? What is the timeline for the clean-up effort? Will the state fully fund this project? We can imagine the misuse of funds in renovating the riverside facilities only to watch the new buildings fall into dilapidation while the state drags the river clean-up.Last, the author does not consider where these additional funds will be entertained from. The current budget situation mu st be assessed to determine if this increase can be afforded. In a sense, the City may not be willing to draw money away from other key projects from road improvements to schools and education. The author naively assumes that the money can simply appear without forethought on where it will come from. Examining all the various angles and factors involved with improving riverside recreational facilities, the argument does not justify increasing the budget.While the proposal does set off a possibility, more information is required to warrant any action. Reader Commentary for Essay Response Score 5 Each paragraph in the body of this perceptive essay identifies and examines an unstated assumption that is crucial to the argument. The major assumptions discussed are THAT A SURVEY CAN ACCURATELY PREDICT BEHAVIOR THAT cleanup spot THE RIVER WILL, IN ITSELF, INCREASE RECREATIONAL USAGE THAT STATE PLANS TO CLEAN THE RIVER WILL ACTUALLY BE REALIZED THAT MASON CITY CAN AFFORD TO drop dead MO RE ON RIVERSIDE RECREATIONAL FACILITIES.Support within each paragraph is both thoughtful and thorough. For example, paragraph 2 points out vagueness in the choice of words of the survey Even if water sports rank among the favorite recreational activities of Mason City residents, other sports may still be much more popular. Thus, if the low assumption proves unwarranted, the argument to fund riverside facilities rather than soccer fields or golf courses becomes much weaker. Paragraph 4 considers several reasons why river clean-up plans may not be successful (the plans may be nothing more than campaign promises or funding may not be adequate).Thus, the weakness of the thirdly assumption undermines the argument that river recreation will increase and riverside improvements will be needed at all. Instead of dismissing each assumption in isolation, this response places them in a logical order and considers their connections. Note the appropriate transitions between and within paragr aphs, clarifying the links among the assumptions (e. g. , Closely linked to the surveys or The answer to this question requires ). Along with strong development, this response also displays facility with language.Minor errors in punctuation are present, but word choices are apt and sentences suitably varied in pattern and length. The response uses a number of rhetorical questions, but the implied answers are always clear enough to support the points being made. Thus, the response satisfies all requirements for a score of 5, but its development is not thorough or compelling enough for a 6. Essay Response Score 4 The bother with the arguement is the assumption that if the Mason River were cleaned up, that people would use it for water sports and recreation.This is not necessarily true, as people may rank water sports among their favorite recreational activities, but that does not mean that those same people have the financial ability, time or equipment to pursue those interests. Ho wever, even if the writer of the arguement is correct in assuming that the Mason River will be used more by the citys residents, the arguement does not say why the recreational facilities need more money. If recreational facilities already exist along the Mason River, why should the city allot more money to fund them?If the recreational facilities already in existence will be used more in the coming old age, then they will be making more money for themselves, eliminating the need for the city government to devote more money to them. consort to the arguement, the reason people are not using the Mason River for water sports is because of the smell and the quality of water, not because the recreational facilities are unacceptable. If the city government alloted more money to the recreational facilities, then the budget is being cut from some other important city project. Also, if the assumptions proved unwarranted, and more people did not use the river for recreation, then much money has been wasted, not only the money for the recreational facilities, but also the money that was used to clean up the river to attract more people in the first place.Reader Commentary for Essay Response Score 4 This competent response identifies two unstated assumptions THAT CLEANING UP THE MASON RIVER WILL LEAD TO INCREASED RECREATIONAL USE THAT EXISTING FACILITIES ALONG THE RIVER NEED MORE FUNDING Paragraph 1 offers reasons why the first assumption is questionable (e. g. , residents may not have the necessary time or money for water sports). Similarly, paragraphs 2 and 3 explain that riverside recreational facilities may already be adequate and may, in fact, produce additional income if usage increases.Thus, the response is adequately developed and satisfactorily organized to show how the argument depends on questionable assumptions. However, this essay does not rise to a score of 5 because it fails to consider several other unstated assumptions (e. g. , that the survey is relia ble or that the efforts to clean the river will be successful). Furthermore, the final paragraph makes some extraneous, unsupported assertions of its own. Mason City may actually have a budget free so that cuts to other projects will not be necessary, and cleaning the river may provide other real benefits even if it is not used more for water sports.This response is generally free of errors in grammar and usage and displays sufficient control of language to support a score of 4. Essay Response Score 3 Surveys are created to speak for the people however, surveys do not always speak for the whole community. A survey completed by Mason City residents cogitate that the residents enjoy water sports as a form of recreation. If that is so evident, why has the river not been used? The blame can not be soley be primed(p) on the city park department. The city park department can only do as much as they observe.The real issue is not the residents use of the river, but their desire for a mo re pleasant smell and a more pleasant sight. If the city government cleans the river, it might take years for the smell to go away. If the budget is changed to accomodate the clean up of the Mason River, other problems will arise. The residents will then begin to complain about other issues in their city that will be ignored because of the great emphasis being placed on Mason River. If more money is taken out of the budget to clean the river an assumption can be made. This assumption is that the budget for another part of cit maintenance or building will be tapped into to.In addition, to the budget being used to clean up Mason River, it will also be allocated in increasing riverside recreational facilites. The government is trying to accommodate its residents, and one can warrant that the role of the government is to please the people. There are many assumptions being made however, the government can not make the assumption that people want the river to be cleaned so that they can use it for recreational water activities. The government has to realize the long term effects that their end will have on the monetary value of their budget.Reader Commentary for Essay Response Score 3 Even though much of this essay is tangential, it offers some relevant examination of the arguments assumptions. The early sentences mention a questionable assumption (that the survey results are reliable) but do not explain how the survey might have been flawed. Then the response drifts to irrelevant matters a defense of the city park department, a prediction of budget problems and the problem of pleasing city residents. Some records even introduce unwarranted assumptions that are not part of the original argument (e. g. ,The residents will then begin to complain about other issues and This assumption is that the budget for another part of city maintenance or building will be tapped into).Near the end, the response does right on note that city government should not assume that re sidents want to use the river for recreation. Hence, the proposal to increase funding for riverside recreational facilities may not be justified. In summary, the language in this response is reasonably clear, but its examination of unstated assumptions remains limited and therefore earns a score of 3. Essay Response Score 2.This statement looks like logical, but there are some wrong sentences in it which is not logical. First, this statement mentions raking water sports as their favorite recreational activities at the first sentence. However, it seems to have a ralation between the first sentence and the setence which mentions that increase the quality of the rivers water and the rivers smell. This is a wrong cause and result to figure out the problem. Second, as a reponse to the complaints from residents, the state plan to clean up the river. As a result, the state expects that water sports will increase.When you look at two sentences, the result is not appropriate for the cause. Third, the last statement is the conclusion. However, even though residents rank water sports, the city government might devote the budget to another issue. This statement is also a wrong cause and result. In summary, the statement is not logical because there are some errors in it. The supporting setences are not strong enough to support this issue. Reader Commentary for Essay Response Score 2 Although this essay appears to be carefully organized, it does not follow the directions for the designate childbed.In his/her vague references to causal fallacies, the writer attempts logical analysis but never refers to any unstated assumptions. Furthermore, several errors in grammar and sentence structure come in with meaning (e. g. , This statement looks like logical, but there are some wrong sentences in it which is not logical). Because this response does not follow the directions for the assigned task and contains errors in sentence structure and logical development, it earns a sc ore of 2. Essay Response Score 1 The statement assumes that everyone in Mason City enjoys some sort of recreational activity, which may not be necessarily true.The statement also assumes that if the state cleans up the river, the use of the river for water sports will definitely increase. Reader Commentary for Essay Response Score 1 The brevity of this two-sentence response makes it fundamentally deficient. Sentence 1 states an assumption that is actually not present in the argument, and sentence 2 correctly states an assumption but provides no discussion of its implications. Although the response may begin to address the assigned task, it offers no development. As such, it is all the way extremely brief providing little evidence of an organized response and should earn a score of 1.